There are two things that I'd like to share before beginning. In the last post, I stated that someone accused me of asking God for the illness, then asking Him for the cure. This was borne out of a misunderstanding of words on my part. Secondly, when I was first diagnosed, a very good friend of mine said, "This trial is not only for you but for those around you as well." While I didn't understand what that meant back then, today it is becoming abundantly clear. This is about Jesus Christ, not Natasha and Andrew. This is about His ability to restore, heal, uplift, strengthen, empower and love. This is the testimony about Jesus Christ, our Saviour and Redeemer.
In January 2008 I went to see a surgeon who advised me I had spinal tumours. While it had upset me greatly, I began to block it out. It wasn't cancer, so who cared? I was busy with my job (having recently been promoted), and really didn't have time for all of 'that'. I even went on a trip to Trinidad a few weeks later. One day, in a grocery store in Trinidad, my left leg buckled. I shrugged it off, acting as though I just stumbled. Then, upon my return to Canada, on my way home from work, I stumbled downtown in the snow. That got my attention. I started to notice a weakening in my left leg and intense pain. When I finally fell a third time, outside the GO Station in Ajax, I figured out it was time for action. You see, we had been putting off calling the surgeon, hoping that GOD would intervene miraculously. We prayed and prayed, then I made the call. The surgery was scheduled for a date in June 2008.
GOD has a plan:
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
As the surgery date rolled around, I was nervous yet at peace. My family and extended family were there in great support, to pray as we went through this. I prayed and sought the LORD- I prayed for Jesus to be with me in the surgery. I prayed for the surgeons, nurses and medical staff. I prayed a blessing for them in the name of Jesus, and off I went.
Then there were complications. What was supposed to a 4 1/2 hr operation ended up being 8 1/2hrs. Another surgeon was called in to assist, who thanks be to GOD, just happened to be right next door. However, while this was going on unbeknownst to me, I was in bliss!
Let me explain. I had a vision of seeing Jesus, the Lamb of God. I saw such a radiant light that my entire being experienced a joy that surpassed anything I had ever imagined. I felt joy bubbling up like a wellspring inside. My husband saw me as I was wheeled into the recovery room, and he said my face was glowing. I remember feeling joy and saying over and over again, "I saw Jesus, I saw Jesus!" I couldn't open my eyes, but I could hear people around me. I told one nurse in particular, "Jesus loves YOU." I never saw her, but heard her.
What I didn't know is that she had been asking GOD, that very day, if she was loved by Him. She shared this story with my sister 7 months later, when I returned for the second round. It was a word from GOD she needed to hear at the appointed time.
Brothers and sisters, TRUST GOD in the trial. He has a plan for your lives. Cling to Him in your brokenness and watch Him redeem your mourning for dancing, your suffering for the surpassing joy of knowing Him even more. Till next week, I leave you with this:
"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.'" Jeremiah 29:11-13